Monday, March 29, 2010

i wish i could be braver

sometimes, i really wish i'd be less shy
some of you might not know me well,but deep down..i am a very shy person
i don't easily open up myself to people
hence sometimes, some people might think that i'm a quiet and inactive person
i don't quite talk to strangers.infact, i almost ran out of topics to say to someone i first knew every time i meet someone new.
why is it so hard? coming to university itself,i've learnt that i'm becoming a total different person
i'm changing into someone who doesn't like socializing.
i want to meet new friends so much but i just don't know the correct way to approach them
the other day when one of my lecturer whom i quite admire for his intellectual and interesting way of lecture, decided to hold up a opinion session.
we were given two sets of articles and we can raise our hands up to speak up,to tell the class what we think about the articles. and of course, bonus marks are given to students who volunteerily give out their opinions.
at that moment, i just had this sudden urge of voicing out. not for the sake of the bonus marks but i just wana share my ideas. i want to convince my lecturer that i do have my own judgement to issues. there weren't many people who volunteered, and i wanted to join the few that were brave enough to voice out.
i was so confident of the ideas generated but then i was stopped by my own shyness.
i was so afraid that people might not agree to what i was about to say.
i was so afraid that people might judge me based on the opinion i gave.
in the end, i decided not to raise up my hand. and let the golden opportunity slip away.
my mood was totally ruined. what a fool i am?!
common,i am someone from KL, not some small town girl who are afraid of voicing out.
i was so ashamed of myself. =(

1 comment:

Jason Lee said...

ini mesti kasi sikit trigger lar lol.. baru boleh work.. hahaha, cant imagine wadz the surrounding once you open your mouth.. will surely keep on toking, toking and toking..:P